Understanding grief after pet loss
Grief is a natural response to losing someone we love, and that includes our animal companions.
Everyone experiences grief differently. You may feel sadness, loneliness, anger, guilt, numbness or even relief. You may find it difficult to concentrate or sleep, lose interest in things you usually enjoy, or simply feel that you're not quite yourself.
You may experience several emotions at once, or find that they come and go in waves.
Certain things can also bring those feelings back unexpectedly — a photograph, a familiar place, a birthday or anniversary, or simply reaching for the food bowl at the usual time.
There is no set timeline for grieving a pet. Try not to compare your experience with someone else's. Your relationship with your pet was unique, and so is the way you will grieve them.
Be kind to yourself
When we're grieving, everyday things can feel harder than usual.
Give yourself time and space to adjust to life without your pet. Talk to people you trust, maintain your usual routines where possible, and remember to look after yourself.
Simple things such as eating regularly, getting enough rest, staying connected with others and getting outside can help you through difficult days.
You don't need to rush through your grief or put pressure on yourself to feel better by a certain time.
You don't have to stop missing your pet or forget them in order to move forward.
Remembering your pet
Finding a meaningful way to remember your pet can be comforting.
You might choose to:
- Keep a favourite photograph somewhere special.
- Create a memory box with their collar, toy or other treasured items.
- Write down some of your favourite memories.
- Create a photo album or keepsake.
- Plant something in their memory.
- Share stories about them with family and friends.
- Make a donation to an animal organisation in their memory.
There is no right or wrong way to remember a pet. Choose whatever feels meaningful to you.
If you have other pets
If there are other animals in your home, you may notice changes in their behaviour or routine after the loss of their companion.
Try to maintain familiar routines and continue giving them the care, attention and companionship they are used to.
If you're concerned about changes in your pet's health or behaviour, your veterinarian can provide advice specific to your animal.
Helping children through pet loss
For children, losing a pet may be their first experience of losing someone they love.
Give them space to ask questions and talk about their feelings. Children may express grief differently from adults, and they may want to remember their pet in their own way.
Looking through photographs, drawing pictures, sharing favourite memories or creating a small keepsake together can be meaningful ways to remember a much-loved pet.
Kids Helpline — 1800 55 1800: A free, confidential counselling service for children and young people aged 5–25, available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
When you're ready for another pet
There is no set amount of time you need to wait before welcoming another animal into your life.
Some people feel ready within a few weeks, while others need much longer. Some choose not to have another pet at all.
A new pet won't replace the one you've lost but they might bring a little happiness back to your life. Every animal has their own personality and their own special place in our hearts.
If you choose to welcome another pet, it can be the beginning of a new relationship while still holding onto the memories of the one you've lost.
Foster caring can be a nice transition step to see how it feels to have another animal in your life.
Saying goodbye
When a pet dies, there can also be practical decisions to make about how you would like to say goodbye and remember them.
Take the time you need to consider what feels right for you and your family. Whether that's keeping a special memento, creating a memorial or choosing cremation, there are different ways to honour a beloved pet.
At AWL, we understand that saying goodbye is about honouring the relationship you shared and the important place your pet had in your life.
Learn more about Aftercare and pet cremation
When to seek support
While grief is a natural response to loss, it can sometimes feel overwhelming so reaching out for support is a positive step.
You might start by talking with someone you trust, such as a family member or friend. You can also speak with your GP, who can discuss how you're feeling and help connect you with appropriate professional support.
There are also services available if you need someone to talk to:
- Lifeline — 13 11 14: Available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week for crisis support.
- Kids Helpline — 1800 55 1800: A free, confidential counselling service for children and young people aged 5–25, available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
You don't have to go through grief alone, there is help available.
Your pet mattered
The sadness you feel after losing a pet is a reflection of the relationship you shared.
Over time, the memories may become easier to hold. You may find yourself remembering the funny things they did, their little quirks, the routines you shared and all the moments that made them special.
You don't have to forget your pet to move forward.
Their time with you mattered. Their life mattered. And the love you shared will always be part of your story.
Be gentle with yourself as you grieve, and take things one day at a time.
